Shut Up, Little Man!

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The following are examples of obsessive and beloved fans who felt compelled to write or e-mail the liquored up moderator at Shut Up Little Man central. You too can write us via the contact page

(Most recent letters appear first.)

Dear Mr. Eddie Lee Sausage --

Several months ago you were kind enough to send along an order form featuring Raymond and Peter stuff to my old address in Baltimore. Well, since that time I've moved to Brooklyn and promptly lost the order form. I do, however recall that you had mention an upcoming R n' P 7" and a CD of an epic all night battle. Could please send along price info. Finally, if you recall from my first letter: I too am a former resident and survivor of the Lower Haight. My wife and I decided to leave Baltimore because there was too much parking and we were being panhandled much too infrequently. We feel better now.

Rex Doane

Brooklyn, NY
Dear Eddie Lee Sausage: This year my roommate, the asshole motherfucker, and I decided that for a Halloween party we were really going to do it this year - we were going to dress up like the most frightening characters we could think of - Peter and Raymond! Previously, we had dressed up like queer cocksuckers (Boy George, Liberace, etc.), but not this year. So, my roommate Tom dressed up like Peter and I went as Ray. Tom wore a checked shirt and put on a fake moustache and got some blue broccoli bands for cockrings and put them on his wrist. He also got a big bottle of vodka that he marked on the side with a Sharpie. I put on some 'slobby' work clothes, a pair of heavy rim black glasses, and carried around a giant stuffed rabbit to whom I referred all night as 'the girl.' To really get into the part (you know, the Little Man Method Acting School), we had dinner together - chilled lettuce salad (“a cool dinner”) and corned beef hash (“that slop”). Of course, we drink both the wine and the vodka, doing lines from the CD the entire time we ate, drink, and walked to the Halloween party. Needless to say, we had a fuckin' blast. There were some people at the party (a Rick James guy and a Dolly Parton) that knew who we were - mostly because we spoke only lines from the Shut Up Little Man CD all night - we didn't allow ourselves to say anything that was not said on the recordings. But, also, the Dolly Parton woman knew about 'the girl' and that tipped her off from across the room. Anyway, it was a fuckin' good time.

I guess I should add that we got extremely drunk, much more than usual. I am not embarrassed to see that I even puked later that night (keeping in character with Raymond), but unfortunately I didn't get any on myself.

Thanks for the good times, Mr. Sausage, now shut your fuckin' mouth!

Ryan Belvedere
I am looking into both of those stories to see what's going on there (the film project done for the love of it, and Louis Gossett Jr.'s New Obsession). When I can substantiate either absolutely, I will send details. I have actually been hunting for info, but these people are brutal, nomadic.. they disappear when you look for them.
In the meantime I wish to quote from the English humorist Saki (H.H. Munro), who clearly would have had an understanding of the SULM phenomenon had he lived in this time. I think he got reincarnated as Hunter S. Thompson, actually.

This is from "The Peace of Mowsle Barton" in "The Penguin Complete Saki" (Penguin Books 1982). Attend this slug of description concerning two bitter old women:

"There was something alike terrifying and piteous in the spectacle of these frail old morsels of humanity consecrating their last flickering energies to the task of making each other wretched. Hatred seemed to be the one faculty which had survived in undiminished vigor and intensity where all else was falling into ordered and symmetrical decay. And the uneasy part of it was that some horrid unwholesome power seemed to be distilled from their spite and their cursings."

[name redacted]
Eddie
thanks for the reply. it took me a while to track you guys down. i came across you guys late one night unfortunely all my money had been spent on booze. then when i had the money and could track you down (seems like i was really having trouble pulling up your site) to my surprise all you guys took was paypal and i wanted a cassette!!!! so i had to go to amazon cuz i dont trust anything called pal, and all you guys had there was cds so you skinny little cocksuckers milked a few more drinking dollars out of my hand!! so my cd better be forthcoming and the freebie better be a real gem or i will be forced to go to my neighbors house and kick the shit out of his dog and his wife for that matter!! anyways thanks alot.

sportingly, john foster

now that i got the cd how do i get the cassettes without going through some pal?
[Ed: this is a follow-up to the writer's first letter (next in sequence)]
I apreciate your responce and aproval, but I have some sad news about the quick demise of my wonderous wireless device. Before I left Dayton I promised the neighbor who lived across from me in the Oregon district that I would use some of my grad time at the broadcasting college to record a CD for his band. When we finished the session, I went back to his apartment with the band to master their shit down. This was of course the building I had lived in before shit went down with my landlord and the one containing
the notorious Peter and Ray wireless protester device. While i was mastering their shit on the computer and getting a buzz on, I ran the device periodicly. Unfortunately when my girlfriend picked me up, the device was either left on or perhaps triggered from my
pocket. I didnt find out until last week that pete and ray screetched loudly into the night and looped for many hours when people were so badly annoyed that the cops were called on peter and ray yet again (this was the 3rd occasion on this device that the cops made
an appearance). They had to bust into the attic with a crowbar to retreive the wicked machinery. I'm sure my name was mentioned because of my reputation as the building prank player. A sad day or a victory of sorts? you decide. My next peter and ray device is secret to all but few, but facinating. It will be called the peter and ray satelite system and I can say that it may or may not contain a helium-filled weather balloon. Keep me
advised on those CD's,. By the way... the two people who initialy introduced me to shut up little man are friends with your cousin Seath. Enjoy Earth, Mr. Sausage and keep in touch for sure.

n. smith
Dayton, oh
mr. sausage,
i have created and deployed a little known device called the peter and ray protester. it is remote triggered and i am the only one who has control. This amazing little machine sits in the attic of a medium sized, multi-story building in the oregon district of dayton, oh with a fairground PA pertruding from the rooftop. when activated, the rants of peter and ray can be heard from quite a distance away. the entire thing is weatherproof and will play endlessly until deactivated by remote again. noone else has access to this thing either. perhaps i am working toward status of #1 fan.

n. smith
Dayton, oh
Dear Mr. Sausage,
About two years ago, or so, I wrote to to You asking for permission to rant about Ray and Pete in an epic, poetic tale I was writing called IMAGO MORTIS. I thought you'd might like an update, since you were sokind as to give me permisson... The two publishers I sent my effort to wiped their dirty asses with my work, they thought it was, quoted in so-or-so many words, a piece of fuckin' shit. So that ends there, goddammit... The good news is, I still listen at least daily to Ray 'n Pete hollerin', my wacky ego undaunted by the bleak
reality of my effort bein' nuttin' but a fuckin' ... destroyed ice cream machine. IMAGO MORTIS was a tale of seven beduin suckers,wandering the desert plains of northern Africa, some 3,000 yrs into the future; at night, they told eac hother stories of the past, telling what remains they knew of these antique times, referring NOT to what we might think (WWIII & Bush & Sonny 'n Cher)but to archaic, sad legends not that well-known on present-day Earth (speculating, meanwhile, as to what it was that erased almost all of humanity all of a sudden?). These tales included German romantic poet Georg Trakl committing suicide when confronted by thehorrors of WW1; the weird and haunting failure to identify two of the deceased persons in the famous 1984 fire at King's Cross Underground Station in London; Nazi death camp Commander Eischelsdoerfer, who
was dragged out by allied forces to unwillingly (I wonder why?) pose amongst the corpses of his reign at the end of WWII; the untimely return of Christ to Earth, when he gets nailed right back up on the cross 'cos nobody believs him; Son of Satan (no comment); the concept of Unreal Online Tournament Botmatch ...Oh yeah, and Ray 'n Pete...According to Storytelling Giant Dahka (a sword-wielding crazee), there once was a monk called Sausagius who declared the Religion of Raymondus and Peterous; two humble peasants who embodied the Duality of Man's Love and Hate in their Supreme Loathing Words. Sausagius thesis was based on the promise that one day these prophets would return, to bring Shite onthee World! ... The premise (is that even a word, in English?) is that a commercial crisp company's satelite has started to automatically de-code pulsating radio signals from a distant star (the voices of said beduines), as well as
analyzing them down to being an echo from Earth, a couple of thousand years into the future. Meaning, the earth echo returns backwards in time, since the concept of time only exists for decent fuckin' human beings. Of cource, the crisp buisness-people get killed in CIA car crashes, and the whole story is told in the manner of a secretive, boring Government memo. I don't know anything about physics, so maybe that's why I thought this was a good idea for a story?
...
Hey look. I don't hope you're thinkin' I think I'm smarter than everybody else. I'm a gentle person, I don't hate queers, I don't ... hate. I'm a rantin' sonofabitch, perhaps, but I'm a decent fuckin' human bein... a man! Now you know the storyline for what I
asked permission for; I'm thinking unwisely to re-work the shit 'n send it to publishers once again. So if any fuckin' queer ever wants to publish my shit, I'm going to dump the ... I'll contact you, then. Please take care, 'n be proud, because the cultural void you filled with the help of Ray 'n Pete will last; because, as I said two years ago, you did it with Empathy!

Yours, if You wanna attack,
Jan Tall,
Sweden
Hello Eddie Lee,

It's been a few years now since I was introduced to Peter and Raymond through your dirsturbing, stomach-cramp-inducing tapes. They are my friends; I keep their memories in my heart and their voices in my soul. At times, they speak through me. I'm a special effects makeup artist in the film industry out here in Los Angeles, and quite a few among our ranks have been converted to the cause. You'd be surprised how many sculptors, painters, writers and editors (and God knows who else) listen to these tapes on a nightly and daily basis, even using it as their preferred background material for falling asleep. But they don't eat doag food, they eat HUMAN food; they are normal people like you and me, of different colors and creeds, from all walks of life. Sure, some people will turn white, leave the room red in the face, or demand that the tape be turned off. But that's at least 50% of the fun. People just can't stand to face what's real. People don't want to accept that Peter and Raymond help to fuel the entertainment industry, that they influence human culture.

In Tibetan culture there is a paranormal thing called a "tulpa," which is a consciousness or entity created by a person's (or persons') thoughts. We can only hope that the continued cult following inspires us to meditate on Peter and Raymond's lives and philosophies, their screeching drunken rants and horrendous fights, that their vibrations might be made to live forever in the ether. When times are tough and money tight, Peter and Raymond are always there to inspire and console.

Some of my friends have expressed interest in creating an eating establishment (like a cafe') inspired by Peter and Raymond's diets (and speech). The menu might include Peter's Breakfast (coffee and an English muffin), the Fuckin' Bowl o' Soup, The Crucified Chicken Dinner, the Cool Dinner, and Raymond's Dinner (Carrots 'n' Peas 'n' Onions in THAT Sumbitch).

I just want you to know that I'm grateful. I don't know how I ever got along...I don't know what I would do without them!! They bring the truth and the light. GOOD!! YOU COCKSUCKER!!!!


Most sincerely,

[name redacted]
Hey Eddie, I was just wondering if you were still selling the SULM cd? I lost mine and I am really craving some Peter and Ray. I'm startin' to think that I may be one a' them queer cocksuckers. Could you let me know where to send my money so that I can get another cd, or if you want I could just buy you 4 liters of wine. Good night sweet prince!

-A fuckin' piece a' shit from VA
Come on you filthy cocksuckers! I don't wish you were dead, but I certainly wish that you would release the 9 unreleased minutes of Ray and Pete. You guys are the gate keepers! WE NEED YOU TO GET ON THE BALL! I have been waiting for 2 years! You keep making excuses. I will buy all the clearer CDs. I will place a huge order. Please hurry! I am almost in tears! You dirty son of a bitch!

Brian Ritthaler

P.S. Have you been in contact with Tony lately? I would pay $10,000 for the girl!
Hey Eddie Lee, I bought the Ray and Peter CD several years ago (probably 7 or 8) and have listened to it on and off for years. My buddies and I are big fans and regularly refer to each other as "little man", " the girl", "darling", etc.

Any way, enough bullshit, I dragged my wife and one year old daughter over to the lower Haight last weekend while on a trip to SF in order to visit the Pepto Palace. Here are a couple of photos.

Good night sweet prince,
Jeff
Dear Eddie:

You are already know I am fascinated and obessed by the tapes so I will just cut the crap.

What I want to know is there anymore history on Peter Haskett? His face haunts me. I keep imagining him young, functioning, feeling okay in life before the alcohol completely caught up with him.

I laugh uproariously (and sometimes very nervously) at the tapes but deep inside I want to cry also.

Thanks for listening, Nancyellen
Greetings, Master Sausage. I wrote you and your buddy years ago, and you wrote me back. I don't remember what I said, I don't remember what you said. I should have taped it, I guess. (In the background, as I type this, Ray is talking about what a decent fookin' man he is, and what a truly gentle heart he really has...) I hadn't listened to this in a long time, and it somehow rose to the top of a stack of CD's on my printer. I'm really enjoying it, in a noir sort of way of course (and with all requisite empathy), and I am again amazed at the inner fortitude you and D had to muster to suffer this madness. In 1986 I myself was tormented by Mad Max, Housepainter from Hell (perhaps a cousin of Tony's?), who was appointed by my landlady to paint our not very expansive apartment building, and who, six months later, was finally applying PRIMER to the HALF of the building he had managed to "prep" by that point. His ceaseless and aimless clatterings drove me to the brink of madness - the CIA should employ this technique at Gitmo. I still fall to pieces whenever I hear the rustling of sandpaper. (She did eventually get Max a disc sander - astoundingly, he was slower with that than with the manual stuff; our walls have nice circular motifs as he would just stand there and press the thing into the wall...) But still, I never heard Mad Max screaming at the top of his lungs about what a decent human being he really was. (And as I never heard him laugh, I cannot appraise the veracity of his giggle.)

It's been nearly 15 years since my ex-friend Mary saw the notice for the play "Shut Up Little Man" at some ipsy-pipsy gallery in L.A. I still have a rusting can of Aunt Mary's Kitchen Corned Beef Hash that I bought afterwards to commemorate the event. Today I'm wondering how you guys fared in the aftermath of the horror. Did you settle down and raise families? Do you spend all your "disposable income" on therapy? Do you still get invited home for Thanksgiving? (Do you remember to wash your flannel shirt beforehand...) In a word, howzit?

Would love to hear from you.

Regards,
Androooooo
Dear Mr. Sausage, I hold in great esteem (is that the fuckin' English spelling?) your answer to my drunken rant. Because, to me, You are the Artist and Ray & Pete are the Objective (the capital O is modern art bull, which you know, I believe). May it is, then. In the words of one of the greatest artists, ever, Nikolaj Gogol: "I'm gonna burn my work and you lot will be ever sorry!" (He burned some crap correspondance, and the beginning of Dead Souls part II, which was ever the better according to about a thousand b-s literary critics). Aw, I'm rambling but that is Your Lot, dear Mr. Sausage for having charged upon the world the 'works' of Mr. Huffman & Mr. Haskett; Hell HATH no fury, ho ho. When the Burgoise of Paris asked Mr. Rimbaud to please explain his Poetic Theory behind the poem 'Life is Elsewhere', he is reported to have rebuttled: "But Sir, do You not know the Ways of Ray? And the Wisdoms of Pete?" Whereupon it was reported that a Sighting was called upon, of a Ghoul taking the shape of Ray with a wine bottle in one hand. Lord and the churchyards of old hath no fury. Ray is about 'n his gonna kill some people. Aw, seriously. I've said before your project is genious. After that, I can say only I wish you the best of times and I hope you're doing well in your life. Poetically (wrongly fuckin' spelled, perhaps) you're doing good: It'd take a lifetime for anyone with ever such a good reason to do good. No, sorry. I'm trying to give you a compliment but I'm quite Ray, after 3 litres of wine. Rimbaud had a publisher when he said 'Life is elsewhere'. Ray had a publisher when he said 'Anybody fucks with my shit...'. That was you! You're up there with Gogol's publisher and that wimp who thought David Bowie was to reckoned with... Hm. Ok. Take care. The reason I'm sayin' that is you are a good person. You're a gentle person. Hey look...

Jan Tall
It's not a normal thing that a human being has to say this to their friends, but I have to say it to you, Eddie Lee, because I have not received my shit.

I have told all my friends (Don Silva, Janice Steinman, et al.) That if anyone fucks with my shit, well, I might be standing here with an AK47, because I know how to use any gun,,,, any weapon there is. I may not be able to whup everyone, but I can sure as hell kill any cocksucker that lives.

You didn't know I could tap dance, did you?

Please send my shit ASAP,,,, I'll be out of the hospital in two weeks, and I'm gonna get a job and my shit better be here by then.

Thanks.

OK
RC
Well, I just got out of the hospital and I thought it would be a good time to bolster my collection. I think I need CDs 6 & 7 and I was also going to go in for some of the interview tapes, but I have drunk the wine and I am drunk. Do you still have this shit? what is the new shit that you have? I told my wife that all I wanted for christmas was a little time with Peter & Ray. Thanks.

OK
RC
Mr. Sausage. Just looking for an update on the cds. Did Furnace Mfg. give you a drink in back? Oh Bath Comfort.

I'm being laid off (which makes me a decent human bean) this week, just in time for the celebration of buying a lot of stuff in the name of the baby Jesus H.R. Christ. I'll be here till Dec. 22.

If you get this and feel inclined to respond, you can do so to this address up to the afore mention date, after that, my home email which is as follows: XXXXXXXXX I would still like to buy those cd's even if I'm jobless; I'll scrounge up bottles if necessary. I don't think I better say anymore, Tony. If you sell me that shit, you're gonna have prove . . you're gonna have to do it on purpose.

I'd like to talk to you again.

No, no, no. Sit down. Has anyone ever done any research into Ray's past i.e. his family, where he's originally from etc? The interview tape with Peter kind of gives a glimpse of his past, but Ray's to me is a mystery. If I'm unemployed for an extended period of time, I'd like draft a screenplay of the Ray and Pete story. I know it's been done, but I've always thought of doing it from a different angle. There's so much dialog on the tapes, anybody could transcribe it and make a play out of it. I'd like to delve deeper into the people that they were. I'm sure you get these type of crackpot emails all the time.

Thank You, Thank You. You're a decent human bean.
Lee
"Uh ... They also said what a fool you were."

Hey there, Lee. Just thought I'd open this email with one of my favorite lines. First, I want to thank you for making these recordings. My best friend and I LIVED on that shit our entire Freshman year at New York University. Every single stinking night we played it as we went to bed. You know how people say you should listen to something you want to learn and remember while you're falling asleep? Well, all I'd need is one refreshing run-through and I could recite the whole shit. It never failed to crack us up to all hell, and as we suffered one anxiety attack after another (being away from our neurotic Jewish mamas in South Jersey for the first time and completely on our own), a night of "Raymond and Pete" made EVERYTHING better.

We still find ourselves quoting it and cracking each other up. He lives with his long-time girlfriend in Jersey City and does location scouting for the film and television industry, and I live with my wife in Brooklyn, NY, and I'm a successful club DJ, and though we're both 30+ years old and NYU was a long time ago, there won't be a single phone conversation sans a "sorry darling." It has been tatood in the back of our brains and will NEVER come off.

The real reason I write is because I want to buy stuff for my best friend for his 31st birthday. You say on your website to go to Amazon, but it's listed in a confusing way and they don't seem to have shit. I want the t-shirt, the comic book, the CD, the "peter and tony" interview cassette, the bumper stickers, all that shit, and Amazon is pissing me off.

What can I do?

Please write back,

DJ Herbert
1-CD

WORE OUT OLD ONE-NEED NEW ONE

MATT VERELLEN
Hi, I followed a link from the Hells Angels website to the Ribeye Brothers site. This is a band that I will be seeing at an Angels bike show in England this weekend. From Ribeye I got to Shut up Little Man and from there I got to Amazon to find they're not selling that first cassette you made, only the CD. Is there any way I can get my $7 worth of the first cassette using my debit card, has this stuff spread over the Atlantic yet, are you guys dealing in British pounds, will I spend too much time wondering if what went on in the Pepto-Bismol palace is any different from what we get with alchoholics over here.

It's a worry,

Paul Fraser.
You lazy cocksuckers! WHERE IS THE NEW SHIT! Drew and Mike in Detroit have
been telling us about a new 9 minutes for years now! They also mentioned you were going to have more merchandise. You guys should sell them the rights to all of hte Ray and Pete shit. They would have had it out. They kicked you out of the army because......because you aint a human being! Go live SOuth of Market, you're on Welfare! Get this shit out! You filthy cocksuckers! Or I am coming out there, with the soup!

Brian
Eddie,

Dino here! Just wanted to tell you that I recently got an iPod and I am in love
with Shuffle mode, because Pete and Ray keep popping up between songs as if by
some crazed, brain-damaged DJ! Still fresh after all these years!

Hey, I have a new CD, let me know where to send if you'd like one...

Dino DiMuro
Hey, man.

You said people could email if they have any queries, etc. I have a "query!" Heh heh heh, get it? "QUERY?" Huh? Huh? Get it? Ok, hang loose.

Kevin in Toronto
Hey Nextdoor, Thank you. Thank you Tony, for getting back to me. You a decent human being. I'm counting the days. You provide the world with a wonderful service and you should be rewarded. I' feel like I'm waiting for the new Beatles album to come out. This is huge. If you're hungry, there's some pork in that sum *itch. The world woulda ben better off if Ray and Pete woulda ben video taped. Thanx, Lee Openshaw
Greetings, fellow human bein'. Is there still any work towards a Ray & Pete movie production? I suppose that as time goes on, the likelihood of a movie probably will reduce. What do you say, you dirty fuckin' piece of fuckin' shit? Those cocksuckin' producers anyway. I want to stick them with that fork.

Eric, Ray & Pete aficionado

P.S. I visited the Pepto Palace during the summer of 2004, and it is no longer Pepto colored. Also, O'Looney's was boarded up; I suppose that without two cocksuckers buying 4L of wine a day business has deteriorated.
Hi Eddie:

This is Rahul from India. I wrote to you back on 16th of September, requesting the exact price for all the cassettes and 36 track cd, along with the interview that a radio station from New Zealand conducted with Pter and also your encounter with the drunkin cock loving homo. I will send you another email within a couple of days listing exactly what I had originally requested. My problem is that I am gonna leave for Bombay (India) on 2nd November from Toronto and I would really appreciate if it you could send me all that stinking shit I ordered by the end of this month. I find myself in a very precarious position cause my dick licking Homo friends in India have fallen in love with the two old drunken bastards. I recorded a couple of tracks from the Mike and Drew show on 101.1 wrif in Detroit and I took it with me when I went back earlier this year. Believe it or not but Ray and Peter are a big hit in INDIA. One of my friends told me that there are now around 30 or 40 guys constantly ranting out one liners like "SHUT UP LITTLE MAN"! AND "I WANT HIM DECLARED A NUISANCE AND I WANT HIM TAKEN AWAY FOR THE NIGHT!" They have formed an insatiable pool like appetite for the stinking shit dished out by the two old queer m'fuckers. I fear I will get lynched if I go back empty handed. So EDDIE "SAVE MY ASS" and send me all the stuff, I requested, by the end of the month. So, until next time, this is the professional pussy man saying dish out some more shit on those ugly wrinkled ass m'fuckers cause we are still hungry.

LATER. Rahul Jham
So like I imagine you get a lot of fan mail and shit like this, but I need to commend you real quick on the releasing of Peter and Raymond's life to the world. The CD is amazing, I think like them a lot when I get drunk, I listened to your CD the other day after dropping some acid, and just had car sirens and fist fight sounds going in my head the whole time, and couldn't stop calling people Sally June Abigail May and asking which end is his ass. This aside, I just got your really outdated catalog shit in the mail, and you have a cryptic "in stock" scrawled on part of it, and I am writing to see if this implies everything else is NOT in stock, or if you are just drawing attention to the fact because it frequently isn't. And also, do you have some of them T-shirts because I need to wear Peter and Raymond. Yeah. Sorry about the ramblings, just telling you how profoundly this CD has influenced my life of late. Or for the past two no three now years.

Alex Cook
Hey listen, you fuckin piece of shits. . .

Sorry I haven't been in touch for the past couple of years i've been roaming the country, drinking too mcuh etc. I pretty much shot most of my money to hell so the Payn'Pete feature film is pretty much in the can for now. although I've got a few other "projects" in mind. One is the "raymond and Peter meet Red" opera (ha ha) that im going to do with a friend of mine up in Virginia as soon as I can get up there. Im also going to try to interview Peter over the phone (I found his number) if I can get some people to split the bill with me. Hope all is well

Jim Taylor

Grimesland, NC
Mitchell and Eddie Lee,

I'm sure you guys get a lot of letters that all sound the same, but I want you to know that I am not the average idiot that may pester you.

The reason for this letter is I am a hopeless fan/devotee/addict of "Shut Up Little Man!" Raymond and Peter are my heros! I would be lying if I told you I am not the same person I was before I heard them because they changed my life!! I will never be the same, and thank God or whatever for that. I have a small story of my devotion and quest for more of the holy words of my violent foul mouth, eniebriated Gods.

In the fall of 1991, a friend of mine told me about a tape a friend made for him. He said it was the most incredible thing in the world. He told me of thease two men who would get drunk, beat each other up and scream at each other constantly. At first I thought this would be really dumb or stupid.

Then a few weeks later, I got a copy he dubbed for me in the mail. I thougt this would be really dumb, but I was hooked and addicted within the first five minutes! The evilness, the bleakness, the tales of the dark side of life, god, I was hooked. Within a few days, I was obsessed. I listend to this tape all the time. I even lost interest in listening to my music. It seemed that whenever I was awake the tape was on. After a short while I found myself quoting Ray and Peter, I still do this now! When I felt confident that I could learn nor gain anything more from the tape, I allowed my friends to hear the tape and the tape changed their lives too. I watched as Pay and Pete destroyed their resistance. Soon they were addicted and quoting all the time. We would even at times break into verbal arguements Ray and Pete style. We still do this. We today are followers of the gospel of two beilgerant drunks. Man, life is great!

The came my quest. To find more of the truth. The tape I had by now was severly worn, by overplay and the abuse of having different liquids spilled on it.

After some time, I found a comic book of "Shut Up Little Man." This was pretty good but most important thing is that there was an order form from Tedium House. I thought I had gone to heaven. I sent away for all eight tapes. A few weeks later I got my money back with a letter from Tedium House basically telling me to screw off. I felt like my world had come crashing down. I was crushed.

My look soon changed for the better. I took a trip to Portland Oregon where I found a copy of "Shut Up Little Man" on CD. This was great! Now the words of Ray and Peter would never fade away. Later that summer my friend and I went to San Francisco and while we were there, we hunted for Stiener Street but had no luck. We both wanted to actually see where it all took place.

Within the past year, I have found vol. III and vol. IV of the tapes. I thought God sent thease to me. I am pretty happy.

Yesterday I got a call from the friend who sent me that first tape. he said he got your address and received a newsletter from you guys and most all an order form for all the tapes, T-shirts and so on.

Thus, here is my letter. To think that I may be reaching the end of my four year quest leavs me beyond speachless. Life as I know it may be complete. So guys, I would give anything to get your newsletter and an order form. Please send them to me as soon as possible.

Now, I would like to thank both of you for recording these men. Without your efforts I would have never gotten a copy of them. You have both contributed to what I am today. I can't even think you enough for everything!!! Your hard work has changed the life of at least me not to mention many others. Keep up the work, and good luck in no matter what you do.

A devoted devottee, fan and follower,

Rob Baughman

Yakima, WA

PS: [Phone number] Shoud you ever want to call. Even though you won't but there you go...

PLEASE SEND ME YOUR NEWSLETTER AND ORDER FORM. . . PLEASE!!!

the best thing for me, according to my doctors is for me to end this letter and say. . .*%&$#*9!!
Dear Eddie Lee Sausage.

Listen here you dirty fuckin' piece of shit. . . if you have the time could you write me a little bit about Tony. Why was he so quiet? It seems like he might have been there during a lot of Peter and Ray's shit flinging. What the fuck did Tony look like?

Tony has a mini cult following here in Tampa, FL. Where or what is Tony these daze? I ain't no queer cocksucker I'm just curious about Tony.

Adam Gryzenski

Tampa, FL
Hey Eddie Lee!

Howya doin! I went to see the Pepto Bismal palace on Steiner a couple of weeks ago. It looked almost exactly like I had it pictured in my mind -- except it was a bit more dark and sinister than I imagined. I've lived in lots of different shitty places -- worse than the Steiner apts definitely, so I'm not easily spooked, but theres some aura of evil that place has, that made me think that if I hung out there any longer I was gonna come face to face with the Devil.

Take care and thanks!

Blair Miller

San Francisco, CA
WE NEED MORE RAYMOND AND PETER. NOW. RIGHT NOW.

Sugy

Lawrence, KS
Eddie Lee,

I just purchased your Raymond and Peter "Shut Up Little Man" CD at a used CD store. I can't believe anyone would want to part with this masterpiece of mayhem!

I have just put track #5 (Someday I Will Kill You) on my answering machine, and so far -- no bill collectors have left messages!

Thank you for hours of enjoyment and terror,

Chris Szabo

Wayne, Michigan
Dear Neighbors:

I know it may be cutting it a bit close for Christmas delivery, but I've got a queer cocksucker on my gift list who has been naughty this year (giggling falsely, touching my shit, etc.) and therefore deserves some of your asshole piece of shit merchandise stuffed in his stocking. So consider my order.

I enclose my check for a total of $18.00, a fucking bargain at twice the price. The check is good, in contrast to those given to Ray by Pete for the rent. Anyway, enjoy the holidays with the traditional six-course meal (corned beef hash and five liters of wine) and send me my shit quick. I promise to order more goodies in the future and to get my twisted, sick fuck friends to order from you as well. Thanks.

[Anonymous]

Oklahoma City, OK
Eddie lee sausage and mitchel d

ok, now here is what i need.

volume 1, two cds, "Peter and Tony," and "Peter in the Tenderloin."

so, that's 5 items in all. i have enclosed a check. thanx for being such a cocksucker, you fuckin' dog. oh, yeah -- i am in a band called USED and we used a sample from "Shut Up Little Man" at the beginning of the song. we will send you a copy as soon as the single is printed up and your names WILL be on the packaging. i found out about "Shut Up Little Man" through a friend who attends ball state university in muncie, indiana. seems peter and ray are big hits down there. well, until my next order -- keep it out of your asses and learn not to burn.

FUCK YOU

Traig Foltz

Goshen, Indiana